We have been conditioned to think of many things as either ___ or ___. You can be this or that—be a leader or a follower, a giver or a receiver, a teacher or a student. But the truth is, progress, upward mobility and balance come not from choosing one side but from fully embodying both, simultaneously and intentionally.
Here are the most essential roles we must simultaneously and permanently play throughout life no matter what we are doing if we want balance, effectiveness and progress. Never let yourself become oblivious to any of them if you want to attain the highest and truest expression of yourself.
- Leader and Follower
- While you are leading others, also be led by them. And while you are leading in some spaces and areas of life, be a devoted follower in other spaces and areas where others are leading. Ensure that you are not only a leader or only a follower in all areas of life. You were born to be a leader in at least one area of gifting.
- Teacher and Student
- The best teachers are always learning about what they teach and about a lot of things to broaden their scope and perspectives. And the best students easily recognize that they learn faster by teaching not by learning. So, in life, always strive to be a teacher and a student of what you teach at the same time. I am a leadership developer because I have decided to be a permanent student of leadership.
- Mentor and Mentee
- A great mentor is often one who is mentored by another. They know how to be resourceful, open, friendly and supportive both as a mentor and as a mentee and this makes them great at both. While you mentor someone, be mentored by someone. It’s a dance, it’s ping pong.
- Consumer and Creator/producer
- We live in a hyper consumption culture and era. We have way more than we need in information especially. And what this does is that it has made a few permanent creators, and the rest permanent consumers. The best creators tend to consume a lot of content, but they consume not just to consume but to create something that’s better. Don’t only consume knowledge, create new knowledge. Don’t only take from the outside-in but mix and match within and give out something nuanced and unique.
- Giver and Receiver
- Giving without receiving leads to depletion. Receiving without giving leads to entitlement. A healthy balance keeps relationships and communities strong. Be a strong cheerful giver and receiver.
- Reader, writer, speaker, listener: These had to go together because they are tools to the same end: communicating and connecting deeply and authentically.
- Read to learn new things and to program your mind. Read to expand your world.
- Write to think critically about what you think about. If you never write seriously, you hardly can be certain that you think seriously.
- Speak to share what you know with the world and exercise your mind more dynamically.
- Listen intently to hear others and make them feel heard and seen. Listen to hear what is said and what is implied but never assume. Clarifying is part of listening.
Do not allow culture or anything to force you to play only one side of these dual roles. Playing both allows you to see things through different and highly relevant lenses. It teaches you to not judge too quickly or too harshly. To know the world from the perspective of the other who you need to interact with effectively. A leader who is also a follower in another setting is more likely to be in touch with his own followers and connect more intimately with their unvoiced concerns.
The Path to Mastering Both Sides
- Dynamism: Never define yourself too narrowly or one-dimensionally. Reject either/or and embrace both/and. Maintain a flexible, dynamic, versatile view of yourself, knowing that you can be both a leader and a follower in the same instant. Push back any compulsion, internal/external to suppress yourself in anyway or to be only this or that.
- Self-awareness: Recognize when you are stuck in one role and actively seek the other side. In your acknowledgement that “I am a leader” should be an implicit knowing of yourself as a follower.
- Intentional practice: Consciously embody both roles in different areas of your life. Be intentional about embodying a multifaceted and multidimensional self.
- Humility and openness: Accept that you don’t always have to be the expert, having all the answers and solutions at the drop of a question. Befriend not knowing. The greatest wisdom always comes from being the student, the listener, and the follower who leads.
By embracing both sides, we unlock new levels of growth, resilience, and wisdom. The question isn’t whether you should lead or follow, teach or learn, give or receive. The real challenge is: can you hold both, all the time?
